Night light

The light from the street light outside our house comes in through Victorian stained glass in the stonework over the porch outside, before being refracted through the rather nasty probably 60's-ish patterned glass over the front door itself.

I took this a couple of weeks ago, on my way downstairs to make the morning cuppa. Even when I don't have to get up too early for work, LG has to be out to school by 7.30, so we see lots of dark mornings in the winter.

I'd been thinking that I might not see this comforting sight for some time, now the mornings are light.

For the last 2 nights, however, I've woken at 3 or 4am, and had to read, make drinks etc., in a prolonged effort to get back to sleep. I'm managing not to panic so far. Having suffered from serious insomnia for quite a long while, about a year ago, the thought is always there.... "here I go again".

It truly is the hour of the wolf [though I don't think wolves at all deserve to have their name used in such a negative way] - when my mind goes into overload in relation to issues at work {significant change on the way, may actually be good in the end, but stressful and diplomatically tricky in the meantime} - relationship issues [stalled, rut-like (no, not rutting) {I should be so lucky}] - and above all, my mother, whose remission was like a brief, wonderful holiday, but now we are back to reality. Back but not home.

I'm hoping not to be returning to the lettuce and bananas at midnight.... I could so do without this now. I've been planning to see the doctor about giving up the prozac, but maybe that would be hasty.....

I'm tired, and to be honest, struggling rather at the moment.