Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Spong

What on earth is this stuff, and where does it come from?


Its not that long since I cleaned out these drawers and they were brand SPANKING clean. In fact, not long since they were brand spanking new. The old drawers were completely knackered (fnar fnar), deteriorating by the day, grinding away at the inferior plastic runners and threatening collapse at any minute. M, anti-DIY man, decided to fix them - and just sorted it out! Some of you will realise the significance of this, and gasp.

He did come back initially with the wrong size drawers and had to take them back to be changed. (fnar fnar again) (I'm guessing)
He wouldn't, of course, believe me when I said that similar happens to me/everyone all the time; it was, for him, proof of his ineptitude. BUT - he got it done. Sorted. Whispering smoothly in and out at a touch.

So everything in the drawers was processed, cleaned, sorted, lots of chucking out. Much to the annoyance, no doubt, of Anoia*. Clean and spanking.

*Anoia is the goddess of things that get stuck in drawers. She specializes in oddly shaped things that no one will admit to having bought. You've probably prayed to her in the past, whether you know it or not - along the lines of : "The drawer closed, it should be able to open," and "Who bought this thing, anyway?" She is one of the multitude of deities of Terry Pratchett's Discworld, to be encountered in Going Postal. Which I thoroughly recommend.


So where the hell does this stuff come from? It can only be described as "spong" - the word was an early and invaluable acquisition from my relationship with M. "Spong" being detritus, stuff, gunk, gunge. Of the kind found in corners, the bottom of bags, navels, plug holes etc.

(I can't think too much about the spong in bathroom plug holes, its one of the few things that easily makes me queasy)

To our great amusement, we met some people surnamed Spong a while back. What an excellent surname.


Anyway - so, where does this spong come from? The drawers are SHUT, for goodness sake, nearly all the time. The things which go away in them are CLEAN. Yes, we use the work-top above them for food preparation etc., but not with the drawer open - otherwise it would be sticking uncomfortably into the stomach - and the worktop has an overhang.

Don't get me wrong. This is not a source or cause of great concern to me. It looks like fairly clean spong, to me. Its just a bit of a mystery, and sometimes a little annoying.


Maybe after our drawer replacement and clear out, Annoia cursed us with drawer spong. It sounds like the kind of petty thing she might do.

16 comments:

Pod said...

it's the guinea pigs. our hamster when i was tiny pod, mrs toe, used to escape at night, despite the placing of heavy books on her cage. she would even climb the stairs and be caught scarpering across our beds. one night i crept downstairs and caught her wheeling a crumpet from the kitchen back to her cage. she stopped when i saw her and tried to look like she wasn't doing anything.
keep your eye on them.....

Pod said...

S.P.O.N.G
Suspect Pigs Of the Night (Guinea)

Antipodeesse said...

Delightful and inspiring post! I will link to it immediately!

Wendz said...

Ha ha Pod....

Letty is that guinea pig food amongst the spong or is it dried rice and sawdust and nuts? I can't quite fathom it.

tut-tut said...

My resolution is to clean out all drawers and closets (do you think I will??). Everything looks--well, I don't want to go into it.

lettuce said...

Mystery solved then Pod, thank you. Maybe this will stop me dreaming about the g. pigs escaping - I can dream about them foraging in our kitchen.

And thanks Antipo! oooh I've been linked!! Inspiring though.....? are you planning to leave your drawers open (fnar fnar) in the hope of them filling with spong?

Wendz - its the sawdusty whatever which IS the spong. I can't fathom it either. Not sure I would want to.

Tut-Tut - you'd think I'd have cleaned out this drawer, after my photo and post - wouldn't you?.....

Cream said...

I can see the bottle stopper is obsolete!
I never use them either, I always finish my bottles!

Pod said...

ha ha!
or
Suspect Pigs! Oh Naughty Guineas!

silly us!
;0)

grumpy old woman said...

hahahahaha 'spong' - what a brilliant word - I won't be able to stop myself from using it now.

BTW - your little man is taking over my life ......

~(:o})=

Reya Mellicker said...

Except for the spong, this could be our kitchen drawer. We have exactly the same wine stoppers, wooden chopsticks and ladle! How extraordinary.

Spong is not allowed in our house since I live with two gay men who are meticulous housekeepers. Also we don't have foraging guinea pigs, just large dogs too dumb to understand how to open the drawers.

Terry Pratchett is one of my favorites!

This is a perfect post.

Steve said...

It looks like sawdust. Maybe the drawer mechanism is somehow grinding away the wood, or maybe when you use the counter it makes sawdust fall into the drawer?? Very mysterious.

The funny thing is, I knew someone named Spong too -- Sonya Spong, actually, which has a nice sort of alliterative quality to it.

And re. Pod's comment, what the heck IS a crumpet, anyway? I know it's a bready thing, but I don't think I've ever seen one.

Dizzy said...

Oh Letty you are funny.

I have spong too, but not as much as you! My knives however have tried to escape and made wholes in the end of the tray. When I do notice the spong and holes, which is not every time I open the draw, I tell myself I must get a new knife and fork tray, perhaps I will remember some time.

Nice shiney ladle. Oh, whats the pencil doing in there? Perhaps you have borrowers and they have been up to mischief...

Donna said...

Hehehe I have often wondered about this strange phenomena myself! We occasionally get the odd pube in amonst the spong too, now where the bloody hell does that come from?!!!!

Pod said...

oh donna, how crude
i'm eating my breakfast
:0/

Ex-Shammickite said...

I have an idea... feed the birds with it! They'll be glad of anything at this time of year.

lettuce said...

Yup Cream, same here, it is rarely used!

Oh Naughty Guineas! haha Pod. Silly? Moi? You're the silly one, I'm just humouring you, you know. :o)

Oh dear GOW - how far? the full 9 yards?

Reya, glad to find another Pratchett fan! I esp. love the witches ones, Grannie Weatherwax is one of my heroes.

I don't think its so technical, Steve - more slobby than technical I think. ;p 2 of the Spongs I know are called Sally, and Sam. !!
Crumpets - they're made with a yeast batter and cooked on a skillet, so more yeasty and rich than bread, with lots of holes for the butter to melt into..... slurp.

Yes, possibly borrowers, Dizzy. Tho there are pencils everywhere in our house.

Donna.
Hahahahahaha.
Eeeeewwwwwww.
Hahahahahaha.
Eeeewwwwwwww.
don't fancy breakfast now either.

And ex-shammi - what an excellent idea. Except that - after emptying my birdfeeders almost daily for the past few months, the birds seem to have abandoned me recently. :o( Maybe this will lure them back....